What do impacts, citations and flat tires have in common? They’re all things we absolutely do not want to happen when driving a car.
And yet, they are all terms automakers have used to name vehicles. (OK, flat tire is not the name of a car, but Reventon is, which translates to flat tire in Spanish). The lapse in foresight and good judgment immediately places these monikers among the worst car names in history.
Unfortunately, these three are far from alone. Throughout automotive history, countless bad names have come and gone. From the bizarre to the truly uninspiring, with a number of simply bad ideas mixed in, here are some of the worst names ever bestowed upon an automobile.
Studebaker Dictator
It’s hard to imagine a period when this name would have ever worked, but Studebaker picked the absolute worst time in history to try to sell the American driving public on the Dictator: the advent of World War II.
Interestingly, the model was originally known as the Standard Six. Studebaker began renaming its cars in the 1920s. Although no one could have predicted the future, the automaker sensed enough trouble in the air to use the name Director in the European market.
Dictator lasted a decade on this side of the pond before it became too tarnished a word for Studebaker, which opted to swap in the name Commander in 1937.
Ferrari LaFerrari
If you’re unfamiliar with the beauty that is the Italian language, this name translates to “Ferrari the Ferrari.” The Italian carmaker was aiming for the contextual interpretation of the “definitive” Ferrari, but the name just sounds awkward and lazy.
Renault LeCar
In competition with LaFerrari for the least original car name is Renault’s entry: The Car.
Mitsubishi Minica Lettuce
Lettuce has many positive attributes: It’s a good source of vitamins A and K, helps strengthen bones and has even been shown to improve your sleep. It also plays an indispensable role in a BLT. Shockingly, none of these facts served as inspiration for Mitsubishi’s naming of the Minica Lettuce.
Developed in partnership with the Japanese supermarket chain Seiyu, the car was designed specifically for loading and unloading groceries. The tiny sedan, which had two doors on the passenger side but just one on the driver side, was small enough to travel on small streets suited more for bicycles and rickshaws.
As for the name, Lettuce was the title of a shopping magazine published by Seiyu, which also sold the car right there in its grocery stores.
Isuzu Mysterious Utility Wizard
The Wizard was simply ahead of its time. If it had debuted in the late 1990s instead of the late ’80s, it could have ridden the Harry Potter train broom to success. Instead, the MU Wizard has since been left to compete for worst car name ever.
To make matters worse, there doesn’t appear to be any story behind the name’s origin. It’s like it just appeared out of thin air.
Nissan Friend-ME
The Friend-ME was a concept car Nissan unveiled in 2013 specifically designed to appeal to Chinese 20-somethings. As such, the sedan had a social media-inspired cabin in which all four passengers had access to the same infotainment screens and could share content from their phones onto said screens. An interesting concept, indeed!
While the car’s design highlights the positive attributes of social media, its name reminds us of the worst. It simply reeks of desperation and self-promotion. Nissan even went as far as stylizing it with a capitalized “ME.”
Toyota Deliboy
This was not some sort of traveling sandwich purveyor mobile, just a tiny delivery truck. Its name is supposedly a portmanteau of the words, “delivery” and “boy.” Not only was the moniker a failure, so too was the truck itself. Poorly designed and featuring a woefully underpowered engine, the Deliboy was only in production for a few years.
Subaru BRAT
Like many car names before and since, BRAT is an acronym. In this case, it stands for “Bi-Drive Recreational All-terrain Transporter.” Certainly, Subaru could have gone a different route, but we’re not entirely sure the car maker didn’t choose the name due to, rather than in spite of, its unruly connotations. The BRAT was marketed to younger (dare we say rebellious), off-roading drivers.
Interestingly, the car was quick to live up to its devilish moniker. BRAT models sold in America featured two rear-facing jump seats in the cargo area. This allowed Japan-based Subaru to classify it as a passenger car rather than a light-duty truck, thus eluding a significantly higher import tax.
Honda That’s
Honda, that’s a terrible name for a car. The third-generation of the Honda Life had a head-scratching name that was as grammatically awkward as it was flat-out weird. We’re hoping something got lost in translation from the Japanese automaker and no one truly believed this was going to work.
Kia Pro_cee’d
The Pro_cee’d was the sports version of the Kia Cee’d, giving the South Korean automaker two terrible titles in its portfolio. The company later took the bold step of changing the car’s name to ProCeed.
Know a terrible car name we missed? Let us know in the comments below!
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What doesn’t go is people not reading the comments and saying the same thing over and over again.
Toyota’s Venza. In Japan the word for toilet seat is venza or benza.
For me, a retired English teacher, the worst name for a car was the Toyota Cressida. Cressida was a character in Chaucer and Shakespeare and she was the emblem of unreliability and deception. Why would anyone want to name a car after her?
EDSEL. How could miss this one?!
My favorite (imaginary car) that was announced by David Letterman: The Yugo Screw Yourself
Chevy Nova was a great car and hugely popular in much of the world. But in Spanish “No Va” means “doesn’t go” – so it never sold well in Spanish-speaking countries
NOVA loosely translates to No Va meaning No Go in Spanish
For all you foreign language experts, if you DONT separate the word NOVA (as in Chevrolet), it is defined as new, not no-va. Derived from the Latin novus. I had a 1970 Chevy Nova SS and it was a great car (327/350 )4-speed with positraction.
Also nova can mean to be a star showing sudden large increase in brightness. I only refer to no-va in Spanish for BMW’s, Audi’s, and Mercedes. Lets not forget the terrible ratings for British Land Rovers!!!!!!
You ought to include Chevrolet Nova in South America means “not going”
They change the name years later
I’m surprised no one has mentioned that in 2004, just before the disastrous tsunami hit Asia, Toyota named its Canadian Celica the Tsunami. It’s not great to give your product the name of a natural disaster.
Meh. This whole article seemed like a stretch. More like just one person’s opinion. Many names cited were not awful or controversial. And the author fails to see that adding “La” or “Le” just makes the word that follows a definitive as in THE Ferrari or THE Car.
Nissan Armada, given what happened to the Spanish Armada.
I loved my little yellow Gremlin!
AMC Gremlin, and it had many
Citroën is close enough to lemon. And not the designers fault, but the Borgward sounded too much like Backward. I was one of the elite who owned one.
How about car ads that miss the mark?
Toyota Passeo -means I walk.
Escalade— This is the scaling of fortified walls using ladders, as a form of military attack, which we have all seen in the movies. The military action is so dangerous that those who agree to do it are called “Forlorns” and, whoever makes it up the ladder and in and out of the enemy fort alive is made a sergeant.
Well I guess the Ford Edsel doesn’t really qualify – if anyone is old enough to remember it. Edsel was a member of the Ford family. But it doesn’t make a good car name. The Edsel was discontinued after one or two (?) years because it did not sell. It had a distinctive front grill that looked something like squeezed pursed lips.
Model years: 1958, 1959, 1960.
Most of these comments “don’t go” . Doesn’t anybody read the comments before making one?